A baby is born with a need to be loved - and never outgrows it.
Frank A. Clark
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Our family

Our family
October 2011

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Love Wins.

Everyday i learn that when it comes to this whole process of foster care & adoption there's really no set playbook. No one can say 'this is what happens everytime & this is what happens next' b/c every case is different. It's all just speculation and assumption of what has happened before...

ha! kinda like life i guess.

all that to say, decisions were made today at the mediation, some decisions were good for us...but most of the decisions just result in more waiting on our part. tomorrow's trial will just be a formality of paperwork, unfortunately.

In a perfect world, every party involved in the mediation today would have agreed that we are the absolute best choice for this child. That plan would be taken to court tomorrow, the judge would think it was a great plan, bang the gavel & dismiss court...cut, print, end of story & we all live happily ever after.

But I guess my version is a little too pie-in-the-sky for real life.

In real life there's a lot of red tape.
In real life they like to exhaust all other possibilities.
In real life not everything goes as planned the first time around.
In real life you have to listen to a lot of other opinions that don't make much sense.

disappointed, yes.
pressed, but not crushed.

Hopeful, always.

We have to hold out hope that love wins.
Love always protects
Love always trusts
Love always hopes
Love always perseveres
Love never fails.

it doesn't say that love always gets its way. but i refuse to doubt that love isn't the right decision.

Friday, April 8, 2011

...like a polaroid picture

Tonite was one of those nites that you know you'll remember forever. It wasn't a special occasion and nothing particularly unusual happened. It was just one of those times where you catch yourself in a moment and you realize...something.

My mind is like a polaroid sometimes.

Like the first time I realized that I was in love with Kris. I mean for real in love...not just I really-really like you. I can replay it in my mind and remember everything down to what I was wearing(including the shoes).

It was a perfect spring Sunday afternoon, we were driving w/the windows down...of course, b/c it's oh so much more romantic than if I said and 'we were driving w/the a.c. on'...but seriously, I remember looking over at him as he was driving and it just hit me...THIS IS IT, HE'S THE ONE...and then I laughed out loud.
For some reason I found realizing that this was the real deal amusing. He then asked what I was laughing about and of course I said "nothing".
I knew at that moment that I didn't want to go anywhere or be anywhere if he wasn't going with me. I wanted to ride in the car forever with him...in the passenger seat. (b/c everyone knows the passenger controls the radio)

Tonite was like that...but in a different way. This was the first time I realized(or let myself realize) that this could be it forever.
Soon it could be the 3 of us...

Yep, filing that polaroid away.

I think for the past 10 months we have hoped for the future, but never let ourselves think of or dream about the future. I think tonite was the first time I felt free enough to let myself dream about the possibility...possibilities.

a lefty?
1st baseman?
When do you start T-ball?
and play the drums.
or the guitar.
another musician in the family would be so much fun.

I almost hate to post this one b/c I don't want to jinx anything...b/c I know that just b/c something has potential perform a certain way doesn't mean that it always lives up to it.

But I can't help but think that fostering love would also be fostering hope.

And my hope is in the Lord and He has has already done immeasurably more than all I could ask or imagine, so right now I'm letting my imagination run wild. The possibilities are endless and the potential is good...I won't say great, yet...but good.

Fostering Hope...i like the sound of that.